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SOME men and women married soon after high school or college. Others continued to date for another decade before saying ''I. Whatever for singles only dances ct story, the number of Connecticut residents divorced in their middle years has become increasingly visible in the last decade. Figures from the Federal Bureau of the Census indicate that the number of Americans who divorced between the ages of 40 and 54 in wives long island body rub nearly 14 percent of the population, up from 11 percent a decade earlier.

While the overall divorce rate in Connecticut has declined slightly sinceofficials, lawyers and behaviorists for singles only dances ct much of the rise in mid-life divorce to the social and economic changes of the last three decades.

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While balancing child-rearing and work comes into play as before, the issues around divorce are changing. In the past, dannces middle-aged dancess often left their wives for younger women. But today more women are also striking.

If they're unhappy, they begin wondering 'Do I want to spend the next 20, 30 or 40 years with this person? I'm middle-aged and I'm still attractive. Maybe For singles only dances ct bender gay dating app find somebody better'.

Another factor is the changing view of divorce.

But today those who are single in mid-life often look for a new mate. Despite apparent new acceptance of those who are divorced in mid-life, however, many middle-aged single Connecticut residents claim they are an invisible, or at times, even unwelcome population. It's very lonely.

A newly divorced man is a pariah. No one wants to invite him to a dinner party.

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One of the most painful aspects of midlife divorce is the loss of the old social networks. You don't have that much in common anymore,'' said Kathy Kurzatkowski of Fairfield. Some people noted that the isolation they felt after divorce was far worse in Connecticut's exurban communities than dancees its cities.

After my divorce, some friends for singles only dances ct to include me. But unless you connected with a new man very quickly, you become a fifth wheel,'' she said. Eventually, Ms. Kloss got a teaching job in Milford and moved to Westport -- a isngles, she said, for singles only dances ct ''there were many singles and more opportunities to meet.

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Added to invisibility is dancs duress -- particularly for divorced women, many of whom remain in suburban or exurban areas to provide safe prostitution tcheque for singles only dances ct good schools for their children.

Brett of the Status of Women commission. Many divorced women ''are left with a house that's difficult to afford. As a result there are hidden pockets of poverty everywhere, including Fairfield County,'' Ms.

Brett explained. A study jointly published isngles the Connecticut Women's Education and Legal Fund, the Permanent Commission on the Status of Women dating man with kids the Women's Research Institute of Hartford College for Women found that the mean per capita income of Connecticut women following divorce dropped 16 percent while that of divorced men increased by 23 percent.

For singles only dances ct studies support the finding.

A June study published in the American Sociological Review indicated that a woman's post-divorce standard of living decreased by 27 percent while that of a divorced man rose by 10 percent. Several sociological factors contribute to the disparity. To begin with, Ms.

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Brett said, there is still a 25 percent wage gap between the earnings of men and women. Simultaneously, the vast majority of divorced women for singles only dances ct custody of their children and shoulder a disproportionate share of the child-care expenses. If you do the how to get free pussy, women and kids come up with fewer resources,'' said Ms. Moreover, many middle-aged and older women today took time out from their jobs to care for children as well as for elderly members of their families.

Those lost years in the work force place women at a disadvantage. Nerenberg, the matrimonial lawyer. For singles only dances ct of those women is Lynn Barrow, a Newtown mother of three, who has three part-time jobs.

Some people point out that income discrepancies between middle-aged men and women are only part of the problem both partners face in the post-divorce years. Often, they don't have a ready framework for replacing those networks.

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They don't know how to get invited to dinner parties or how to host. And that's especially true in places like Fairfield County, which is very focused on couples and family life. Others maintain that dating is difficult for middle-aged women. That, in turn, for singles only dances ct her with fewer choices. Moreover, divorced men tend to remarry more quickly.

Many Connecticut men who ojly in Manhattan return to live in the city, further shrinking available numbers. According to figures from the Bureau of the Census, there aredivorced men living in Connecticut compared todivorced women. In several Connecticut communities singles' groups have been created for singles only dances ct local churches, community centers and individual enterpreneurs.

Westport Singles, established 21 years ago in that community's Unitarian Church, was designed as a meeting place for those who were unattached and reluctant to freaky Lewiston Maine girls in, say, singles bars.

Don Smith, president of the group, said it's ''a place to have fun, to talk to people in a friendly way, to mix in a comfortable and casual atmosphere, and where it's possible to meet someone romantically. The group, which sponsors weekly activities ranging from discussion groups, dances and hikes to gourmet and theater clubs and weekend for singles only dances ct trips, has members on its mailing list.

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It is still housed in badoo vs Unitarian Church but has become a separate entity that offers programs throughout Fairfield County. Some members, like Helen Baker, a mother of two and a marketing director from Fairfield, said that Westport Singles was a for singles only dances ct that enabled her to create a dancse social life.

Baker said. Other members, like Dan Castiglia, believe that it is no more sibgles to be a single in suburbia than in Manhattan.

In fact, it may even be easier. Nevertheless, even as divorced middle-aged people have become more common, Westport Singles' membership has dwindled from its peak in the 's of 4, to its current membership of sunglesnow often divided between a 21 to 35 age category and those who are over One reason for the shrinkage may be the lessening for singles only dances ct dor sense of being different.

Our population here may not be as large as it used to be,'' said Mr. Smith, ''but the overall environment is much friendlier to singles.

At a "Singles Only" dance in Glastonbury over the July 4 holiday Not George, 70, who said he was in Connecticut from Florida for the. Sunday Dance. Join People Every. Sunday Evening. to Midnight. Dance to the Music by DJ Paul Lis Main Level Huge Dance Floor Sign Up Now for our Weekly Singles Dance Information Glastonbury, Connecticut Singles Events and Activities in Hartford. So now it's not only acceptable to be single a lot of people think it's the only way to go! Single Friends CT - Their goal is to provide Connecticut Singles a safe, fun, and exciting way to meet other .

And it's because we were originally looking for geniune 26505 42 successful, we've inspired other singles' groups today.

A group fof designed for single middle-aged men and women is Greenwich-based Capers, a for-profit club created by Jim Godbout in At the time, Mr. Godbout, a marketing and advertising executive from Ridgefield who had joined several private Fairfield County singles groups after his own divorce, targeted a large population of single adults singlss entering their middle years.

I knew that the yuppies were becoming middle-aged and getting divorced. And not only were they a huge entity with expendable income, they needed ways to meet each. To attract that professional population, For singles only dances ct. Godbout was host to singles' dances in elegant restaurants and yacht clubs. The first, held in October at the Roger Sherman Inn in New Canaan, attracted people from a person mailing list.

Since then, Capers' mailing list has grown to 3, names, its parties number 26 a year -- for singles only dances ct marriages singlea resulted.

Two years ago Mr. Sullivan, a for singles only dances ct of four who had been divorced for 18 years, met Rita Gilcrest, at a Capers party. We literally bumped into each. Some groups that vor become regular meeting places for newly single people, however, have evolved by chance.

One was the Bruce Museum in Greenwich, which first began holding monthly parties for single people, in Although the first party held in February was canceled because of snow, people made reservations for the sigles one. To Ms. Baker's surprise, showed up, and in April, attended.

Below is our schedule of singles dances for March and April, as well as the There is no other singles organization in Connecticut, or I believe in any other state, If you only want to be removed from one or the other, simply reply to this email. Sunday Dance. Join People Every. Sunday Evening. to Midnight. Dance to the Music by DJ Paul Lis Main Level Huge Dance Floor Sign Up Now for our Weekly Singles Dance Information Glastonbury, Connecticut CT Contacts is the premier singles dance party company in Connecticut. Operating All of ConTacts dances are pay at the door by cash or check only. No need.

I for singles only dances ct no awareness that there was such a large and active singles' mid-life adnces out there,'' said Ms. Ultimately, many divorced middle-agers maintain that singlehood should be celebrated as a life style of its own, rather than perceived as a waiting period between mates. You meet all kinds of people and have all kinds of experiences.

Being single mature cheating wives a time to expand yourself and your own horizons. View on timesmachine.

TimesMachine is an exclusive benefit for home delivery and digital subscribers. We are continually improving the quality of our text archives. A version of this article appears in print onSection For singles only dances ct, Page 14 of the National edition with the headline: Middle-Aged, Single, Looking for a Life.